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  • Writer's pictureSelene Morales Serrano

Lesson from the "One"

How to stand up for myself. Give myself what I need, first. Take back my power. See my worth.

Are a few things that come up when I reflect upon this significant lesson of completion.

We desire and yean to find that other that makes us feel whole and complete. We use words like: grounded, secure, safe, seen, heard, validated, desired, loved. Seeking all of these things in other. And yet the other is seeking for those similar things. Leaving us in an incomplete circle.

Where we continue to create the same patterns based from fear and trauma.

The child who didn't receive unconditional love but conditional love instead.

The child who was abandoned, searching for that missing piece outside of themselves.

The child who was abused and doesn't know healthy boundaries; when enough is enough.

The goal is union. - At least that's what it's been for me, and today we're seeing more and more of this common goal for partnership.

Both feeling whole and complete on their own, even while being in partnership. One where we don't seek for something or someone outside of ourselves. Where we don't blame or expect the other to feed and fuel our needs.

We learn to give it to ourselves. First by becoming aware of what our needs and boundaries are.

Honoring yourself as the person you are. Love yourself first. Learn the ways you like to be touched. What turns you on, relaxes you, creates space in your body and what doesn't. Making you contract.

Get to know yourself on a deeper level.

When we do this, we don't expect or want to gain it from others. We give ourselves the love we desire and deserve. We become whole. Working in unity within ourselves. Then it becomes a dance, a feeding of giving and receiving.

A flow. A river.

Becoming your own lover, first. Dancing within the energies of sacred masculine and feminine within you and watching what unfolds. - You may attract what you're looking for. One who dances in their own and gives you the same in which you give to yourself.

Working with the masculine and feminine aspects within ourselves.

How does your masculine show up for your feminine?

Does he run you a bath? Make a healthy meal to feed you? Does he give you space to feel and express your emotions? Is he present with you?

How does your feminine show up for your masculine?

Is she patient with you? Does she give you time and space to reset? Is she gentle and caring? Able to take the lead?

Let it become your practice. Enjoy the beauty of becoming your own lover. - Even when you do find or are in partnership, the dance within doesn't stop. And dancing with another becomes effortless.

Two whole beings create an infinite circle of give and receive. Of chaos and order. Constantly flowing. Never needing from the other. But wanting. Wanting to give the love, to feed you, to spend time with you. Share with you.

It becomes a true form of Unconditional Love. Where one sees the other completely. Accepts them as they are. And expects nothing less and nothing more.

That to me speaks true partnership. Or at least.. The beginning of what a sacred partnership may look and feel like.




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